Dil Ka Funda..

Have you ever had that moment when you get a bunch of questions popping into your head when you hear about something or see an incident? Well, I've been reading and seeing articles about relationships for quite some time and felt compelled to write about. If not to vent my own frustration, to find out if anyone else feels the same. If you don't agree or have an answer to any of the these questions/statements, please do comment as this is something that has me somewhat dumbfounded.

Having written an article on Salman Khan and Katrina Kaif's recent break up, I have been reading a bit about what each have openly said to the media and how many articles have been written about them. But it wasn't just them that got me thinking. Now yes, I am talking about couples in the limelight of Indian Film Industry but what I witness as well is how the aam janta - my family, friends, colleagues or even people that I follow on Twitter - respond to it including their emotions, ideals and/or morals on the topic.

Its evident that as people change relationships will as well but certain fundamental principles seem to have no place in today's society. But the desire to be in a relationship and be loved by someone still stands. The issues that I have been witnessing over the last few years, and more so in the last 6 months, seems to boil down to one thing. Self. That is the importance given to oneself and ones needs/desires/wants. Ultimately, remaining in a loveless relationship and being abused either mentally, physically or emotionally is not something that I endorse but at the same time, the threshold for the common person seems to have reduced. I know that circumstances in life dont stay the same and my life is perfect example of what can happen if you hold on too long or get into something that you dont believe in. But the amount of broken relationships that one witnesses is increasing and there is no age limit to it either.

I maybe wrong in that its only now this is happening but in all honesty, the ratio of failed relationship have increased for sure. It isn't that I am looking for these situations either. As a sort of agony aunt to my friends and relatives, my exposure to relationships is limited I know but at the same time, the above mentioned articles plus the on-going buzz about certain relationships does make a impact. Further to that a friend said that I shouldn't take relationship in filmdom seriously. What is that supposed to mean? People are people. Whether your famous or not, it doesn't make a difference. The fact is  things that once had importance dont seem to exist anymore.

Yes there are people that still value the concept marriage, including myself, and family. I would be stupid to look past some of my favourite on screen couples that have proven themselves to be normal yet made for each other in real life too [Suriya-Jyothika, Ajith-Shalini, Madhavan-Sarika]. But these people are hard to come by. The concept of arranged marriage still exists but the number of times my younger cousins or non-Sri Lankan/Indian friends are me why I'm agreeing to it is testament to how absurd they feel it is. 

So while on one side you have people that see marriage as a hinderance and prefer to remain as "partners" or a "living together" couple. On the other side you have people that aren't hesitating to form a relationship even while they've been in another for years. Then you have people that have spent close to a lifetime together and separating for the most peculiar reasons. Yes, I dont know the history and there may be valid reasons for it all but like I mentioned, this is a thought of mine. Why is it that after spending so many years of their life together, couples separate for the same things that were present at the beginning of the relationship? Why does there seem to be a rush to start and end things officially? Have the traditions of 'Till death do us part' died with previous generations? There are alot of girls that I know that dont entertain the idea of living together relationships only because they cant find the right guy and there parents would have a field day. I know parents that are aware of their childrens' relationship with someone they don't approve but say that 'its an age thing, they'll get over it' as they turn a blind eye to it.

I recently read a a weekly magazine that had tidbit articles about the latest gossip topic of Prabhu Deva and Nayanthara's open affair. Beyond my opinion of this relationship, the article talks of supposed compromises between the parties and whatnot. But there was a question-answer section that said if Prabhu [Sivaji's son] and Khushbu were together now, they would have stood a better chance now than in their era. I don't know about you but that doesn't sound like a good thing to me. 

Standing by your friends is something everyone agrees on and has followed for years but where has the era gone for people who lived their lives with one person? Circumstances out of our control can forgive people who love again but in all honesty, is being someone's ex a title worth having..